Writer's Block: Forgive and forget?

[cattygabriel]

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I loved Lucifer very much, once; he was my closest friend, and I also respected him as His Second and the leader of the Host. He was the bright Morningstar; his name, Lucifer, meant Light-Bringer, and he was truly the highest, most glorious angel in Heaven.

And then he defied our Father, and Fell, and took a third of the Host with him. Heaven was never the same after that. I watched him Fall, and it hurt. And when we ran into each other after that... he was so changed, and yet you could still see vestiges of the angel he had been once.

Most of the time, as far as I am concerned, the Lucifer I knew is dead. But then there are times when I think back on our subsequent encounters and wonder how much of him is left in Satan.

Comments

[halosphere.livejournal.com]

"I understand," he said softly. And he did, but the hurt he felt over it was still there. As if he, a Healer, would ever hurt him. He wouldn't hurt a fly (and Oreo cookie shake perhaps. But not a fly...) So did that mean...

"You don't have to trust me, Gabriel," he finally said, gazing back up into what little sky poked through their patchy ceiling. "It... It's okay..."

[cattygabriel]

Gabriel reached out to touch Raphael's shoulder, squeezing gently. "I do trust you, Raphael. More than I trust most people. Just... not with my wings. I'm sorry."

[halosphere.livejournal.com]

"You don't have anything to explain my friend," he offered what he hoped was a reassuring smile before flopping back into the leaves. "I wonder what it's like to really feel that kind of love. You know... The kind where you can trust someone enough to give them your heart. I've loved before, but I can't say I've ever allowed myself to let someone that close." He closed his eyes, picturing beautiful angels holding hands and kissing, halos aglow with something they both shared. He wanted that. Maybe someday.

"Do you think you'll trust Michael with your wings?" he asked.

[cattygabriel]

"Lucifer was... we weren't lovers, I assure you. Just very close friends."

Already tense, he was ramrod-stiff now at the mention of Michael. "How many in Heaven know about this? Michael and I are... not on the best of terms."

Yet the idea of Michael grooming his wings for him... most of him shied away from the idea, but there was a tiny part of him that longed for it. And he was afraid of that part.

[halosphere.livejournal.com]

OOC: Oops! I got mixed up about which universe we were in :3

Raphael sat up slowly again, emerald gaze fixed on the Messenger. He could sense the unease and felt guilty for the cause. He had intended to get his mind off that pain he seemed doomed to eternally carry with him, but once again the Healer had to be an idiot.

"Gabriel, you seem to be the only one who doesn't realize how much Michael cares for you." He let out a sigh. A browning leaf came down to stick unnoticed in his crimson hair. "I understand your pain, I really do. So please understand when I say that it will only harm you to carry it around. I bear a scar very similar to yours and it burns in ways that are so painful that I feel I cannot inhale. But Gabriel... Oh Gabriel... What if I allowed myself to no longer trust? What if I continued to carry it alone?"

His heart ached, wishing with everything he had that he could heal his friend's bleeding heart.

[cattygabriel]

No problem, I wasn't very clear! I should make these things clear. xD Generally, if the entry's tagged as AIM RP, he's with Michael. If not, it's usually whatever's going on in-game unless stated otherwise. <3

"I do trust," Gabriel said softly. "Just... not to that extent. And it's myself I don't trust, Raphael. I'd hate myself if anything happened to Michael because of me."

He hugged Raphael lightly, not knowing what to say to the Healer's pain.

[halosphere.livejournal.com]

OOC: Okay! I'll start watching the Tags better :3

Raphael closed his eyes, letting himself melt in the embrace of his friend. He had never spoken a word to anyone about what he had done for the other Archangels, about the promise he had made. It frieghtened him sometimes. But other times -like this- it was comforting to know that Gabriel and Michael and even Aziraphale would never know the pain of Falling. Oh dear Messenger... If only you could understand that everything will be okay...

He let a purr escape his throat, soft and gentle as the Healer's touch.

[cattygabriel]

Gabriel smiled a bit at the purring. "Will you purr if I tickle under your chin or give you some milk?" he teased, trying to change the subject.

[halosphere.livejournal.com]

"I just might purr anyway." He laughed whole-heartedly and leaped up, pinning the Messenger down with both hands. "I got you now!" he grinned, bits of leaves caught on his hair and clothes. His now-wayward feathers very much resembled a very red tree with all the leaves that had caught onto the soft down. Green eyes glinted with mischief. "I know you're ticklish!" he grinned. "Don't think I won't do it!" 

[cattygabriel]

Gabriel considered his situation. Then he beat his wings hard, which lifted him off the ground slightly, and used the distraction to quickly grip Raphael's wrists tightly and push him off - not too hard - with the other hand.

"There," he smiled.

[halosphere.livejournal.com]

"Heeeeeey!" He gave a pout, quibbling a little, then twisted free and launched into the air. He stuck his tongue out playfully. "Bet you can't catch meeeeeee!"

Who cares if they were acting like children? Gabriel needed it, and it did Raphael's heart good to see the Messenger seemingly happy. If only it could always be this simple, he thought, peering around for the aformentioned Archangel. 

[cattygabriel]

Lauging, Gabriel took to the skies as well, looping and swooping for a few moments before giving chase.

[halosphere.livejournal.com]

Raphael curled his wings, doing backwards summersaults in the cool air. Beating his wings quickly he let himself be taken higher, knowing full well that, if he wanted to, the Messenger could easily catch him.

"Let's see how high we can go!" he called.

[cattygabriel]

The wind ruffling his feathers felt so good, and Gabriel took a deep breath, letting his eyes close for a moment.

Instead of answering, he simply flew faster, gaining on Raphael swiftly.